In a Hole: Living With Autism

Written for www.woodencauliflower.com

By Ryan Pilot

Jasper is a ten year old who screams in public, bangs his head against the wall as a way of communicating, rarely does what he is asked and will lie down on the floor without warning in public.

Jasper was diagnosed at four as having autism. His autism is severe and affects him greatly. One of his carers is Chris Costello, a twenty-two year old art student, studying at Newcastle University.

500 000 people have autism in the UK and 60 million worldwide, but you probably would not recognise it in an autistic child. Jasper flaps his hands when he is overly stimulated and hits his head against hard surfaces to feel pain when he’s angry.

“It’s kind of a shock, because if a normal kid start to scream in public everyone stares anyway, but having an autistic kid scream in public; it’s about three times as worse ... he’s older than the acceptable age to do that sort of thing.” explains Chris.

You might think Jasper was just having a tantrum if you saw this sort of behaviour; this attitude can be frustrating for Chris.

“It annoys me because I know he’s autistic and the general reaction is [that] people will actually come up to you and say “oh is he ok?” and things. It’s half concern and half is ... disgust.”
Chris works part time with Jasper, he teaches him the sort of social and communication skills that come naturally to most people, but have to be learned by people with autism.

“It’s mainly about involving him in society, so I teach him life skills and how to communicate ... We’ve [Chris and other carers] had to teach him over time how to ask for the toilet ... At first he was very fidgety and we wouldn’t know what he wanted ... His mam would say “he needs the toilet,” ... so then you would take him up to the toilet ... When he goes to the toilet you would have to say, “Can I have toilet please?” and then after a while he’d start repeating after you.”
Jasper has to learn not only to identify physical objects, but how to read people. He finds it nearly impossible to interpret other people’s emotions and even his own.

“Every time he cries we repeat to him “sad” so that he learns that he’s sad when he’s crying and when he’s screaming, and when he’s happy and he’s smiling we have to say to him “happy, happy”.” explains Chris.

Another skill Chris teaches Jasper is how to draw. But in order to draw something Jasper first has to be taught what it is he is being asked to draw.

“I’ve had to start from the beginning, so I’ve had to teach him what the sky is, what the grass is and what colours they are,” says Chris. “I would have to take him out and actually show him what the grass and the sky were.”

Chris finds his work rewarding and is proud of Jasper’s progress. He feels closest to him when he is not having to teach him at all, and can just sit with him, with no pressure to communicate. Chris takes Jasper to Tynemouth beach; his and Jasper’s favourite place, where he does not express autistic behaviour.

“It’s nice to take him to the beach because he actually comes out of his hole,” says Chris. “You wouldn’t think he’s autistic when he just sits there and he’s staring at the sea for two hours, or he walks along the beach with you ... You start thinking ‘what is he thinking?’ and ‘why is he staring at these things for so long?’ ... I do that, just to get peace of mind.”

Chris describes Jasper as sometimes being “like a robot,” simply following commands, yet when he is sat in his favourite place, staring at the sea, it gives Chris hope and relief that there is “something there in his head.”